In accordance with my promise that I will continue to collect more artefacts (pls refer my earlier blog @ http://vaishalipargaonkar.blogspot.in/2012/04/resume-blunders.html) ONLY FOR THE SAKE OF HUMOUR! ... here is the 2nd set of Resume Blunders for you.
Hope you have a hearty laugh. Have cited my comments (VP) for each …. Enjoy!
1) Objective:
My first intention is to use my knowledge to understand
my work. As a result of this my work will become easier and I will understand
the strength of my knowledge. It may be beneficial for all and I would get the fruitful
results.
VP: A flowchart representation of intentions and abilities ...
2) Summary :
I myself xxxx have qualified CA Exam. with in three years both groups in one sitting.
VP: What an achievement to boast of! I'm sure my CA friends do comprehend this.
VP: Resume of a secret agent ... I guess!
4) Others:
I
am very passionate about my physical and mental fitness. I do Gym every morning
for workout of 60 minutes and also listen to classical music for urban stress
busting.
VP: Now this can really get me a good job ..... hmmm! Any takers?
5) I MR xxxxx HAVING xx YRS EXPERIANCE IN
CIVIL WORKS WOULD LIKE TO APPLY FOR THE ABOVE SAID POST IF GIVEN CHANCE TO WORK
IN YOUR ESTEEMEED ORGANISATION WILL WORK WITH FULL LOYALTY TOWARDS THE
ORGANISATION ALL GIVEN INFORMATION ARE TRUE MY KNOWLEDGE FOR YOUR KIND APPROVAL
FOR THE SAME
VP: Breathless! This gentleman does not believe in punctuation.
6) Current Designation: Additional
General Manager – Projects
VP: 'Additional' ... ??!! I would never want to be an 'additional' whoever.
7) MORE
IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING ELSE YOU READ IN THIS RESUME IS THE FACT THAT I CAN GET
THINGS DONE. I CAN MAKE THINGS HAPPEN.
VP: Resume of Rajnikant ... yenna rascala !!
8) Career objective :
With my
knowledge and good communication skill I assume my self in a position in an
organization where I can contribute towards the development of organization as
well as hones in all my assignment.
VP: No comments... just laugh :)
9) OBJECTIVE :
TO JOIN A HOTEL AND GROW WITH IT.
VP: Please apply at infancy stage of your life!
10) OBJECTIVE :
To provide the best service
wherein being continuously, as a part of a team that dynamically works towards
growth of the organization and to achieve excellence there of.
VP: Yes... finally we have a Shakespeare in the making..!
And like always... I have saved the best for the last ....
11) I have been able to consummate
advanced techniques with self initiative ability to work effectively to lead
the team effort to its achievements.
VP: Yeah ... I know its dirty thinking... hahaha!
Hope you guys enjoyed reading this. And as promised, I will keep up the good work of collecting such artifacts. If you have come across any creative work, please feel free to share ….
ONLY FOR THE SAKE OF HUMOUR!
Hey and do not forget to mention which one you liked the best!
- VAISHALI PARGAONKAR
